What to do when the love of your life doesn't know he's the love ofyour life (yet)

Your tender heart swoons every time you see Mr.McDreamy at church/small group/the grocery store/wherever it is that you see him. He's the tallish handsome guy with the dark brown eyes and that adorable 5 o'clock shadow (or whatever it is you like in a guy). And the best part? Oh the best part is how much he loves Jesus and his family and his friends. The best part is that he's caring, giving, selfless, and he desperately values His relationship with Christ above all else.

And there you are. Praying every. single. day. "Lord, please let today be the day John Doe asks me to marry him." (because I mean you basically already have the name of your grandchildren picked out so why waste time dating, amiright?!?!) - You can't help it. Your girly hormones are kicking in and you're ready to stop being the mom of the group and finally be a mom to your precious little kiddos.

Oooh but here's the hard part. You feel like he doesn't even know you exist. You're starting to feel so lonely and like it's just never going to happen. You're pretty sure he likes your friend and not you (because let's be real...the "your friend is soo pretty" text is one you get all too often). So now you're thinking, "Oh my goodness maybe I'm not good enough. Maybe I need to be nicer. Maybe I need to dye my hair blonde. What am I doing wrong?!?!"

Girl. Let me stop you right there. First of all, let me reassure you that it's 100% okay to desire a Godly relationship that will challenge you, exemplify the love that Christ has for His church, and give you kiddos (if that's what you want).

Secondly, you are beautiful. If you ever feel like you're comparing yourself or changing who you are because of a the guy you're interested in, that's not bueno (good)! The man that God has for you will never make you second guess how much he loves you. He will never make you second guess your beauty (regardless of whether or not you're wearing makeup). He will push you forward in a healthy way. He will encourage you to achieve greatness because that's what God has for you. He'll fully support your dreams and dream with you. He'll lend his hand with whatever project you're working on. He'll pray for you and with you. He'll pursue you and make sure you know how treasured you are. Don't believe the lies of satan saying that you'll never be good enough or pretty enough or smart enough. Comparison is a thief!

Thirdly, realize that the guy you think is so great...may not be "the one". I'm so sorry babe! But it's the truth. Don't worry though. God has him picked out for you :)

So while you're waiting for the right man to pursue you, pray. Pray pray pray. Ask the Holy Spirit to show you what qualities you should be looking for in a man and what qualities He wants you to keep and develop. Pray that God would continue to develop the Godly man that's inside of your future husband. Keep working towards your current goals! Learn how to do your taxes and balance a budget and put air in your tires. Don't spend so much time daydreaming about the future that you forge to live in the present. Love the family you have, treasure your friends, and give out of what the Lord has poured into you.

xo,
Lily Garay

Fear

     At times I feel invincible. I feel like I'm on top of the world. It's hard to not feel like that when thousands of people are clapping for you. when hundreds of people are cheering you on. when on your birthday one of the most popular things people tell you is "Thank you for being so inspiring and always trying to make me smile".
     I have a great life. There isn't much I can complain about. I constantly find myself in these instantaneous bubbles of happiness which no negative comment could ever burst. But as quickly as they come, they go. Because every day of happiness is another day I wonder when my bubble will burst. Because uncertainty sometimes wins. Insecurity because of the unknown. Careful footsteps in the woods cautious of collapsing in a sink hole.
     Fear. Something that perfect love is supposed to cast out. When I find myself wrapped up in everything good and Holy, I find myself the happiest. That true Love really does cast out all my fears. All my worries. All my anxiety. All my insecurity. And I notice that the days I do not pray or invest time in reading my Bible...are the worst days. To trust in something you've never seen...to believe in someone greater than you... it's an inexplainable...beautiful feeling...It's also one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.
     Facing fear is one of the most important things for me. I love confrontation. That's why I'm not afraid of many things. I'm definitely not very insecure. I know who I am and what I love. but when i look deep inside. 
when i look to the places i would rather leave unexplored, i'm afraid of being alone. no, not the kind of afraid you get when you're a little kid and still need to sleep with the light on. the fear of never getting married. the fear of not having any one who cares about you. the fear of not having any real friends. the fear of being forgotten.
     I hate going shopping alone. I hate being out alone. I hate going to the gym alone. I crave attention. Not a desperate attention. What I really seek for is acceptance. I'm not the type to reach out for attention, but because I'm such an extrovert people don't see me as someone who needs attention. Maybe what I really crave is love. Because as independent as I am, I am nothing without God. As independent as I am, I need love. Don't we all?

What love really means

The little boy I'm babysitting told me that his big brother gave him this sticker and he's been waiting all day to use it, but he wants to save it and then he said, "this is MY sticker you can't have it" so I said, "nope, it's mine" "no, it's my sticker" "no, it's mine" "you can't have it" "but I want it" "nope" and then he placed it on himself. I giggled and he ran around with his sticker. Later as I was helping his brother with some math he ran up to me and took off his sticker and said, "this is for you. I don't need it anymore." So I said, "Alec......" And I contemplated telling him to keep it because I know how it felt to have a brand new sticker and loving it...so I said, "thank you very much. I love you!" And then he said, "I love you more."  

And that right there is true love<3

P.s. He knows how to use my snapchat without me teaching him and he sent some of my friends a snap today! Hahaha 

What is Love?

The Bible tells us the actions of LOVE. 

1 Cor. 13 

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind.

 It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It even gives us a picture of love. Jesus. 

For me, love is displayed through relationships

and the things you do in those relationships.

Not just boyfriend/girlfriend relationships,

but friendships, mother/daughter/son/daddy,

siblings, family, etc. 

Relationships are God's love here on earth.

At least that's what they're supposed to be anyways.

Sometimes we can get into the wrong relationship.

sometimes we make a mistake.

sometimes a person is there only for a season or for a lesson.

Whatever the case, just cherish moments. 

and learn from each relationship you ever have.

because that's what will make you grow.

Here are a few people/moments 

that I just L<3ve p="">

National Free Hug Day? ;)

XoXo,

Lily Garay